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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26730271">and now we're hanging on by a heartbeat</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/havesomefun/pseuds/havesomefun'>havesomefun</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Critical Role (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Spoilers for EP 111</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:28:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>918</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26730271</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/havesomefun/pseuds/havesomefun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>One night, at the Tower, Yasha ponders on her feelings and meets up with one anxious monk.</p>
<p>Or, how you don't need as many words to comfort someone when you understand each other.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Beauregard Lionett &amp; Yasha, Beauregard Lionett/Yasha</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>87</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>and now we're hanging on by a heartbeat</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There have been a lot of changes lately. </p>
<p>For once, they have left the intensive heat of the islands to meet another extreme in the cold of the North. Then, mysteries unfolded and a revelation shook all they knew about a dearly departed friend. Well, if he was really departed anyway. </p>
<p>It was a time of uncertainty but a most important change had been a more subtle one; these days, Yasha felt lighter. Her time with the Mighty Nein was full of ups and downs but with every turn and against every enemy they have gone through it together, no judgment, no doubt. At first, she didn’t want to believe it, trust came a bit too easily for her, and being a loyal person is hard in this regard; you never know if your devotion is equally matched, but not with this lot. They were as committed as ever, growing into strong bonds, and lately she was learning she could let go, for they would always catch her, bring her back, punch her in the face until she snapped out of it.</p>
<p>It seems a little too violent, but that’s the way she likes it.</p>
<p>So, these days Yasha embraces change, even though it means trudging through the snow all day long. Luckily, Caleb got the Tower ready just in time to keeping them from completely freezing over and after a day’s walk it’s truly a sanctuary to come back to warm beds and meals. Out of all of them, Yasha always fared better against the cool weather, so when the rest of the Mighty Nien go straight to their rooms to rest, she gets some time for herself with the bookshelves and the hordes of cats. Tonight, a week deep into this pattern, she hears a unusual noise downstairs.</p>
<p>Willing herself down the pit, she follows this inconsistent thumping, blunt hits against the wood. In the Salon, she finds Beauregard, fists rapidly moving, feet shifting, against an assortment of training dummies. She throws a series of punches, then returns to a stationary stance and throws another fit. After the third time she tries a particular sequence, she grunts in frustration and kicks the dummy, turning around and spotting Yasha floating through air a few paces back.</p>
<p>“Yasha?”</p>
<p>“Oh.” Yasha blushes, caught red handed. “Hello, Beau.”</p>
<p>“Sup.” Beau fidgets with the tattered bindings on her fists, also caught red handed.</p>
<p>“I see that you’re training.”</p>
<p>“Yeah… Do you want in? I would’ve… I could’ve… I didn’t hear you.”</p>
<p>“Well…” Yasha didn’t mean to sneak up on Beau but the floating is so nice and comfortable she glides with way too much grace for her bulky self. She lands next to Beau. “We are supposed to be resting.”</p>
<p>Beau sighs, puts her hands on her hips and the lines of worries on her face deepen.</p>
<p>“Is everything ok, Beau?”</p>
<p>She crouches down to the floor and leans on her knees. “The closer we get, more questions pop up in my head. I mean, Vess DeRogna, Molly, Aeor, how deep does this go?”</p>
<p>Yasha releases a sigh herself. There had been a lot of changes and uncertainties lately, one of them being the mysteries surrounding the fallen city of Aeor Beau has taken upon herself to solve. Still, there are so many variables it is almost impossible to piece everything together without new information.</p>
<p>“I don’t know. We’ll figure it out. You’ll figure it out.”</p>
<p>Beau’s eyes turn to her, attentive, and a half smile forms of her lips. Among the many chances that have come to pass, Yasha’s favorite has to be this; hers and Beau’s friendship grows stronger with each day, deeper in a way she hasn’t had in a long time. They joke around each other easily, compliment one another and Yasha appreciates the softness in which she offers her hand every time she sees Yasha is distressed; her palms, in of themselves, are rough, calloused, but always warm, secure. Not that Yasha noticed or anything.</p>
<p>And then there was the flight. Oh, the flight.</p>
<p>The night before the flight, a very vivid dream of Gods and angels took her by storm and a hope for redemption manifested in a pair of shiny new wings. Taking off just in time to catch a falling Beau, Yasha and rises above the reverse waterfall below, immediately taken by the effortlessness in which it comes to her, like a lost memory. Her eyes then land on Beau and she sees it; the wonder in them as Beau looks on to the canopy of trees with the glee of someone who is not used to fly. </p>
<p>When they eventually fall back down, they do it together, tangled on each other and for a few brief seconds she swears there is something more there. Whatever it is, though, she likes it, like she likes their friendship now.</p>
<p>Yasha comes closer and offers her hand to Beau. “You’ll think better on a night’s sleep.”</p>
<p>She takes it and gets up. Unwilling to let go just yet, they stare at heir joined hands for a second and Beau is the first to take hers away, clenching open and shut, almost like she’s containing herself.</p>
<p>“Yep. Gonna go to bed, get me some z’s,” she says, in a dragged-out tone, as she walks back and accidentally hits her elbow on one of the dummies.</p>
<p>Yasha can’t help, but smile. Beau’s awkwardness is utterly too adorable and she’s but a simple lesbian. “Goodnight, Beau.”</p>
<p>“Night, Yash.”</p>
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